


Titanium

by Melobski4



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Derek Hale Has Feelings, Derek is Whipped, Did I mention angst, Drama, Drug Addiction, Drug Use, Happy Ending, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Psychological Drama, Scott is a Good Friend, Stiles Stilinski Deserves Nice Things, Stiles Stilinski is a Mess, Stiles Stilinski-centric, Stiles has problems, Stiles is a self sacrificing idiot, The Pack Being Idiots, The Pack Finds Out, You don't know what you have until it's gone uh lydia?, and surprise the one sided love is from stiles towards lydia, but first agnst, even though he doesn't want to admit it, he is just very bad at them, he just got over her
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-26
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:40:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23323330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melobski4/pseuds/Melobski4
Summary: Stiles had always smelled strange but nothing to worry about, after all Stiles himself was strange, nothing unusual...right?Or that fic in where the pack is a bunch of idiots and take Stiles for granted, Derek has feelings wether he likes it or not, lydia has to get over herself, Scott is a better dad than Stiles' dad and Stiles... has to get help.Or... Stiles' ADHD was worse than everyone thoughttitle may change
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, Lydia Martin/Stiles stilinski one sided, Scott McCall & Stiles Stilinski, Sheriff Stilinski & Stiles Stilinski, Stiles Stilinski & The Pack
Comments: 13
Kudos: 174





	1. I'm bulletproof nothing to loose

**Author's Note:**

> I just love fanfics where Stiles is the centric character, I think there are a lot of fics focusing on action, creatures and blood, personally Stiles is an interesting enough character to write a story surrounding him, his AHDH is almost always mentioned but a very few fanfics take it seriously, I may change some features of this disorder for the sake of the drama, but you all will see as the story takes place.

*Scrub* *Scrub* *Scrub**Scrub* *Scrub*  
*Scrub* *Scrub* *Scrub**Scrub* *Scrub*  
*Scrub* *Scrub* *Scrub**Scrub* *Scrub*

“What the hell is he doing?” Erica asked with a raised eyebrow, Derek was next to her with the same expression watching the boy scrub his floor with an absent face, his long fingers were on the toothbrush scrubbing the surface of his bedroom, his heartbeat was almost catatonic, and his eyes were focused on the bubbles that was creating the soap on the toothbrush against the floor.

“What the fuck?” Jackson was frowning, his arms folded in front of himself watching Stiles and lydia as if she had the answer about what was happening, lydia on the other hand was watching stiles as if he were the most interesting thing she had ever seen.

“Stiles...” Derek said without taking his eyes off of Stiles, the boy didn´t respond. “Stiles” he said again with an slightly raised tone, but Stiles was still scrubbing the floor, Derek let out a desperate sigh, he didn't have time for the idiot's shenanigans. Taking a few steps closer to him, Derek was about to grab his arm before Scott entered the bedroom and took the hand that was about to reach the absent boy with violence.

“Scott I don’t have all the fucking time for your...”  
“Shut up” If looks could kill, Derek would have been buried seven feet underground, Scott’s voice was pure venom, his alpha’s gaze was shining with red of his wolf and fury “Shut the fuck up” he said again, he didn’t even raised his voice, it was more like a whisper, almost imperceptible for the ones who weren't paying attention, yet everyone heard it.

Derek raised his eyebrows, forgetting for just a second his now familiar frown.

“What the hell is your problem?” but Scott’s eyes made him fall into silence again, his eyes went to Stiles who didn’t even bat an eyelash with all the noise and posturing. He took the arm that Scott grabbed and stepped back without taking his eyes from Stiles, something was wrong, his essence was diluted with some sort of strange odor, it didn’t smell bad, just strange, like Stiles but at the same time as if something were covering his smell with the real one, something chemical and artificial. 

“Is he under a spell?” Isaac asked, Scott huffed and rolled his eyes as he crawled slowly and quietly towards Stiles.  
“Stiles?” he said kindly in a whispery voice. All the werewolves present and lydia confusedly watched the strange exchange between Scott and Stiles, no one knew what the hell was happening and it showed in their faces. Erica was beginning to think all this was a very elaborate joke, Lydia thought it was a very desperate attempt from Stiles to get her attention for more than three minutes, Derek didn’t even know what he was thinking meanwhile Isaac and jackson thought it was along the lines of a very powerful and strange spell. 

“Stiles?” Everyone drew their attention towards the two best friends again, Scott was now closer to Stiles trying to make the other guy look at him without any progress, his hands fell softly on his shoulders making his friend tremble slightly but not making him let go of the toothbrush… Scott bit his lips, his face changed to a thoughtful one, he got up and began walking around the room, sniffing, looking for something, the other werewolves began smelling around too but they didn’t know what Scott was trying to look for, so they stopped trying and just watched Scott.

Finally, after what seemed like hours Scott let out a triumphant sound and took a little white bottle hidden in a sock drawer, he opened the bottle and looked inside it, his brows instantly drew together in a worrisome frown, he approached Stiles again and sat down next to him.

“Stiles, how many of these did you take?” But Stiles didn’t respond to the question, “Stiles, please” Scott let out a whine.

“W-what?” Derek took a few steps forwards again and looked, really looked at Stiles, he had glazed eyes, his lips were dry and his hair was grassy and disheveled, like he had been passing his hand in the strands over and over, as he got closer Derek could smell the distinctive essence of desperation, sadness and confusion.

“Stiles?” Derek asked again, his hand was about to touch Stiles’ hair when Scott grabbed his wrist with enough force to almost break it. “Don’t… just don’t touch him, don’t you dare touch him” this time Derek didn’t get angry, he didn’t want to admit it but he was worried for him, the nuisance of his life, the bane of his existence, Stiles wasn’t even babbling, his lips were moving but no voice was heard.

“I thought he was getting better” Scott said, his voice broke and his lips were pressed one against the other trying to keep his sobs from escaping.  
“What?... what does he-?” just when he was about to ask, Stiles stood up fast and looked around the room, his eyes were unfocused. Scott got up slowly, his hand was on Derek’s shoulder forcing him to slow his movements as well.  
“Stiles...” Scott reached out for him but the mole dotted boy left his bedroom and began trotting around the halfway, went down the stairs, took the vegetables out of the fridge and took a knife.  
“Shit! Stiles!”


	2. Fire meet Gasoline

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stiles is tired of the pack's shitty behavior and tells them off, Scott is the bestfriend ever and Derek needs the be a better alpha...  
> what is happening to Stiles?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really really really need a beta right now, someone needs to be my beta right now! if you are interested let me know in the comments, I don't update very frequently or with an official day and my chapters aren't really that long.
> 
> What do you all think? what would you have done in Stile's place? 
> 
> WAIT FOR STEREK IN THE NEXT CHAP

Fire meet gasoline  
I'm burning alive  
I can barely breathe

\- Gasoline, Sia.

* * *

If you asked Stiles what he felt every time he lost consciousness, he would say “nothing” he just felt like himself, it wasn’t a great moment of inspiration like in movies, it wasn’t like an astral travel either or like an out of the body experience he wasn’t fucking  _ Doctor Strange _ , he just felt free but at the same time he felt nothing because he felt lost too he didn’t know what he did while being all weird and shit and he didn’t asked his father either, when the sheriff, caught him in one of his “episodes” he will just go away, those moments reminded him of Claudia and he couldn’t handle it.

So of course, if his own father couldn't stand him what made Stiles think that anyone else could too?, if Stiles told this to any other person; about the sheriff, about his episodes about what he felt, they may think that he was saying that just to get attention, that was the principal motto when someone with mental issues received after explaining everything, so, at the end of the day, Stiles just preferred to let it go, he was ok with his father ignoring his “Personal moments” as he said, with a mocking laugh, as if he was saying it with other meaning, Stiles was ok with this too, He preferred it that way, it was ok for him to be alone, otherwise he wouldn't know how to act after his episodes passed and he was left with an uncomfortable feeling next to the person he was interacting with.

Then Scott came, Stiles would be lying if he said he didn’t really want to be his friend the first time he saw him, anyone would be surprised if they were told this but Stiles used to be a quiet and calm person, a  **wallflower…** he was ok with that, he didn’t want to attract people, but the mere action of being all quiet and gloomy was appealing to more people he was comfortable with, so he changed his strategy.

Be as loud and as annoying as he could be and sooner than later everyone was ten feet apart, Scott was a good balance for this too, when people didn’t want to talk to him (and that was most of the time), they just talked to Scott and Scott would tell him later, if they needed something from him or wanted his notes, the mediator was Scott, easy peasy.

Scott was a good wall against the exterior, for a while life was good, nobody talked to him and Scott was there for him with that hero complex he had always had, and of course, when life is good is when everything goes to shit, in fact “shit”, would be putting it lightly…

It was one day, everything was going normal, and Stiles and Scott were on their break, both talking in whispery voices and eating each other lunches, nothing really happened that could have trigger the response, nobody screamed, nobody went to talk to him, not even Jackson was there, when the full effect of a confusing wave hit his mind, feeling as if a bucket full of cold ice was thrown inside his skull everything went blurry, Scott was still talking but his voice sounded far far away… it sounded like being underwater, it was calm, and Stiles wanted just for a moment to stay there, his eyes went to a butterfly flying away stopping on top of a flower.

Stiles was watching, he heard Scott’s voice again, besides him, louder this time but he just couldn’t concentrate on what he was saying, he didn’t even realize when he began walking towards it, he just knew that the butterfly needed all his focus, he ignored why, but he knew it was important, its colors were calling him and every time one wing moved the other followed perfectly synchronized, Stiles raised his hand, close to his line of sight and saw his fingers moving synchronized as well.

He laughed, he was happy because he could move his fingers like the butterfly’s wings, he could be that butterfly!, he could feel almost flying and for a moment Stiles asked himself if this was what being high felt like, it didn’t really matter because he was happy, he was like the butterfly, and butterflies were pretty normal and beautiful so that meant that he was normal and beautiful too, for that second, minutes hours… whatever, he felt normal, he felt really really good, because he could be whatever he wanted too, he decided in that moment that the butterfly was his new friend, he didn’t even realized he was still laughing louder this time. 

He felt the corners of his eyes watering and his stomach was beginning to hurt, but he was happy so he tried not to pay attention, at least that was what he was trying to do before something landed on his shoulder, shaking him of his stupor, all that happiness he was feeling flew away like the butterfly that in that moment decided to leave Stiles too.

And he felt really really sad and alone, he began crying, he fell on his knees and began sobbing like a two year old child, then the hate came and he turned around to the voice that was calling him since moments ago, Scott was watching him with wide scared eyes, but Stiles didn’t understand why on earth Scott would be scared, because if someone had the right to be sacred at the moment was Stiles, Scott didn’t have the right to be scared, it was Stiles’ moment, and it was ruined because of Scott, stupid, innocent Scott.

Fucking Scott.

Stiles hated him so much, so he did the only reasonable thing he could think of, and punched Scott right on his jaw, he cried but that didn’t matter because Stiles was crying too, and that made him feel better, but crying made him feel sleepy too,so still on top of the fallen Scott, Stiles decided to go to sleep…

He woke up, the first thing he saw was the white ceiling, he heard the tick tock of the clock and felt under his hands the soft touch of the bed he was lying on, he heard voices outside the room but Stiles still felt kind of groggy so he really didn’t pay attention to it, instead he tried to get up, he let out a whine when he felt like his eyes were falling from his skull.

“uuhh...” he complained, instantly the door opened and his father came in, his green eyes fell on his son and his face morphed to one of worry.

“Son...” he said sitting down on the stool next to the bed, one of his big hands took Stiles smaller one “How are you Stiles? How do you feel?” 

Stiles looked at him without saying anything, he didn't feel like so. His father sighed and looked at the nurse that was watching everything from the doorframe.

“I will be taking him home then...” the nurse cleared his throat and said “Can I talk to you for a second sheriff? in private?” his dad nodded and with one more look in his direction he left. 

Stiles let out a deep breath and lay down on the bed again watching the ceiling with an absent face, little by little he was beginning to remember some pieces, Stiles raised his hand and looked at his bloody knuckles, he bit his lip when he felt it begin to wobble, his friendship with Scott was officially over, it was his fault, he will be alone all his life, he will wake up alone and eat alone and then, the next day, he will return to class and everyone will stare him down and will bully him because he hit perfect friendly Scott, he will be no one… well he was always a no one but this time he will be a no one without Scott’s support and Scott’s silly smiles, nobody will ever forget how weird he was, with his stupid moles, his strange upturned nose and fucking big eyes that took most of his face, he hadn’t even realized when he began crying until something touched his face startling him and making him almost fall off the bed.

“Stiles...” the little voice said and Stiles closed his eyes, he wasn’t prepared to face Scott after everything he did “Stiles...” his… friend? said again taking his hand, Stiles opened his eyes, he looked at Scott blurry figure, his watering eyes didn’t permit him to see clearly. “Stiles it’s okay, I am not mad… see?” Stiles rubbed his eyes and saw Scott’s smile “I am so sorry, I really am, I didn’t know what happened, it wasn’t on purpose… well it was, but I don’t know why I did that, you have to believe me, you have to, Scott I... ”

“Stiles!” Stiles closed his mouth and let Scott continue “Stiles I am okay, it hurts but it will pass, I am okay”

“Are you still my friend?” Scott smiled again and squeezed his hand “I am your friend and I will always be your friend Stiles, I will be there for you...”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Shit! Stiles!” Stiles put down the knife like it was burning him, he took some steps backwards until his back hit the fridge making him lose his balance and landing on his knees “Oh god, Stiles” Scott took Stiles by the arms helping him up and walking him towards the sofa where he sat him down with a supporting hand on his back.

“ugghh… What the hell...” Stiles let out a tired sigh and looked at the clock, this episode lasted almost thirty minutes, it was getting worse.

“Stiles are you ok?” He looked at his friend and with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes, he answered “Always” Scott pressed his lips together and open his lips to say something before looking towards the stairs closing his mouth again. Stiles frowned and followed his line of sight, noticing the werewolves and banshee watching him with an expression he couldn’t describe.

“Get out of my house” his voice was surprisingly calm and strong.

“Stiles”

“Shut up lydia” everyone raised their eyebrows, Stiles had never talked to lydia like that “I said get out of my house”.

“Stiles we have more important problems right now...” the mole dotted boy got up from the couch and walked towards Derek standing in front of him, very close. 

“You have made clear… a lot of times, that I am not pack, your betas have wronged me, beaten me, harassed me, and now you come to my house demanding me to solve your problems, well as you can see I am not in the best condition to  _ tolerate _ you, any of you, if you still need me you can come tomorrow, but today I just can’t...” Stiles headed to the door and opened it, making the universal move of “ _ get out _ ” with his hand, after everyone was outside Stiles stopped them.

“And Derek… next time I expect a better behavior from them” and slammed the door in their faces.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you notice any grammar or spelling errors? please let me know I find them very embarrassing!


	3. Say my name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stiles doesn't know what is happening and Derek is beginning to understand

_Say my name, Say my name_

_if you love me let me hear you_

_Say my name, Say my name_

_I'm dying to believe you_

_I feel the long in your arms_

_I feel you breaking my heart_

_-Bebe Rexha, David Guetta, J Balvin_

* * *

He couldn't sleep, for some reason the tic-tac of the clock kept him awake, he could hear the echo resounding inside of his head like a scream, like a horn just next to his head, mocking him and making him breathe heavily, he began rolling around his bed, sweat formed on his temples and the night terrors that he knew came when he was restless started his path behind his closed lids.

With a scream contained in his closed lips Stiles shot out from the bed almost falling, his chest hurt with every breath he took, frantically Stiles ran towards the bathroom, and took the lid off the tank, his trembling hands submerged themselves in the water and took the bottle of pills that was there.

He opened it and took three pills in one sitting, swallowed them dry like a pro, for a moment there Stiles thought of Dr.House and tried to stop his bitter laugh for coming out, he never thought he would compare himself to an addict, a badass addict but an addict still.

With shaking hands he leaned against the sink and looked in the mirror, his eyes were red bloodshot and his skin was pale, almost translucent, he could see that his moles stood out in his white face.

“Stiles?” a deep voice just outside the bathroom startled him “Stiles are you okay? your heart is beating very fast” the mole dotted boy stared at the door for a moment, his hands shook as he turned on the tap and wetted his face “Stiles? I’m going in” 

“No, you are not welcome, what do you want?” said Stiles, looking in the mirror one last time. 

“Stiles...” warned the voice, he rolled his eyes and opened the door almost crashing into Derek “What are you doing here? I told you I didn't want to see you until tomorrow” Stiles could see the corner’s of Derek’s lips turn up in an almost smile, Stiles found it endearing but didn’t comment on it, his green eyes looked at the clock next to his bed he followed what Derek was seeing and realized that it was 00:01 hours.

“it is the next day”

“smartass” Stiles murmured and sat down on the bed staring at him with no expression on his face, Derek responded his gaze with an scowl feeling awkward at seeing Stiles without his smiles and babbling.

“So… the harpies”

“Right harpies” Stiles squared his shoulders and began talking “Beautiful women, really, you have to beware that...”

“Stiles… what is that smell” he didn't formed it as a question he said it in a demanding tone, his eyes were red reflecting the presence of the wolf.

“You came here to talk about the harpies I’m giving you information about them, either listen or go”

“What’s with you?” Stiles fell on the bed watching the ceiling and massaging his temples.

“What do you mean?”

“You are being weird more than usual”   
“And what do you care?” Derek sputtered and looked at the shoes that were scattered around the room.

“I do care about you” he said in a faint breath. Stiles opened his eyes, when did he close them? he could feel the effect of the adderall in his body, like a floating sensation clouding his thinking. “what did you said?” he asked drowsy.

Stiles felt the bed dip and a weight rest on top of him, green eyes appeared in his line of sight and he held his breath, he could feel his heartbeat speed up and the drowsiness of his mind evaporate… just a little.

“I...” Derek whispered, Stiles could feel Derek’s breath touching his lips, two strong forearms on either side of his head caging him in, underneath Derek’s formed body.

“I...” he repeated, Stiles could feel that Derek’s heartbeat was almost as fast as his. “Stiles...” continued the werewolf closing the distance between them.

“Harpies...” interrupted Stiles before their lips touched.

“W-what?” Derek Stammered.

“Harpies can be very dangerous” mentioned Stiles absent, he could feel his mind returning to the main topic, he wanted to focus on Derek but he couldn’t, something didn't let him, his psyche wandered to that scene in “ _ dumbo _ ” where the pink elephants danced and mocked each other, Stiles could feel himself as one of those elephants, floating in the air, the atmosphere full of psychedelic colors and bubbles flittering to the rhythm of the music.

“Stiles!” like a punch in his guts Stiles jumped off the bed sending Derek crashing to the other side and on the floor with a thud “Stiles what the fuck...”

“Harpies Derek harpies...” he repeated walking around with a manic semblant.

“Stiles are you ok?”

“I can’t… I don’t...” Stiles jumped on the bed again, his face buried in his pillow “Harpies… from the greek mythology” his voice sounded muffled “beautiful women, the bestiary says that you can beat them with...”

“Stiles...” The mentioned rolled around facing Derek and looking at the bottle that he had in his grasp, Stiles gulped.

“What is this?”

“My prescription”

“And why was it inside the toilet tank?”

“How do you know that?”

“Werewolf senses Stiles” Derek walked towards the bed and leaned close to Stiles, his face mere inches from his “Stiles...” warned Derek closing in on him, Stiles tried to escape but Derek took him in his arms pressing his body against his and burying his face in the crook of Stiles’ neck.

“Derek let me go” His hands wanted to push Derek off him but the werewolf just embraced him tighter. “Fuck! Derek!” Stiles began thrashing around inside Derek’s arms, his heart was beating faster and faster but this time it was because of the feeling of being caged, the warm temperature of the wolf just made him feel like he was burning, his eyes began watering and big fat tears rolled down his face.

“Derek don’t… just stop touching me you asshole” 

“Stiles you have to calm down”

“Give me my pills! give them to me, Derek!”

“Stiles, no, just listen to my heartbeat ok? you have to listen to it, calm down take deep brea–” Stiles slapped him, Derek was stunned but didn’t say anything.

“Give me my fucking bottle” Stiles said slowly, emphasizing every word. The wolf shook his head without moving from his place in Stiles’ neck.

“Motherfuck–” His words were interrupted by a pair of insisting lips upon his “mnph–!” he gasped and Derek took advantage of it by putting his tongue inside his mouth, caressing every teeth and sending tremors along all of his body making him tremble, his big hands settled on his hips pulling him in against his chest, Stiles’ eyes fluttered shut, his lips were moving frantically against Derek’s, the sound of their lips smacking against each other filled the room, Derek’s hands moved under his pajamas, touching the line of his column, caressing the skin there, stopping for a while in every mole he found.

“Stiles” his voice was raw with desire, his green eyes turned red, he could feel Derek’s claws on his back passing through his waist and seizing him close to his body.

*The harpies are dangerous beasts...* his thoughts were haunting him, sounding like an echo *Harpies, harpies, harpies.. Greek mythology… beasts*

*No, no, no… Focus, focus*

Stiles’ could feel Derek’s big hands going down towards his ass.

*Harpies… beautiful women that...* he could feel the drowsiness returning, his thoughts began wandering, Stiles visualized them like waves in the sea moving constantly. *I can’t let him see me like this… not again* 

“Derek...”his words were swallowed by the wolf’s mouth “Derek stop… I...”

“Stiles I...”

“I want you to go Derek”

“But why?” Derek moved close again.

“I said go, get out, go away!” Stiles got off the bed and entered the bathroom closing the door and going through his medicines that were hidden in a Zip-bag inside his shampoo.

“Stiles!” 

“if you don't go I'm going to call my father”

“You didn't even take your phone with you when you went there Stiles”

“ugh...”

“Stiles...”

“Stop calling my name like that!”

“Stiles get out of there”

“Fuck you!” He took the bag out of the shampoo bottle and opened it taking two pills in one sitting.

“Stiles what are you doing in there? what was that sound?”

“why do you care? just go!”

“if you don’t get out of there I’m going to break the door down”

“if you break the door I’m going to make you pay for it”

“Just get out of there!”

“ **_You_ ** get out of here”

“Stiles...” The door went flying making Stiles scream.

“Holy fuck! are you insane?!”

“Stiles what is that?” Derek pointed to his hand.

“None of your fucking business” He hid the bag behind him.

“Give me that” Derek walked towards Stiles slowly, like he didn’t want to fright a scared cat.

“How many did you take?” Stiles shook his head without saying anything, his eyes were downcasted, his hands gripped tightly the plastic.

“Where is the Sheriff?”

“I don’t know, working I think”

“you think?” Derek furrowed his eyebrows “I thought you were close”

Stiles smiled mockingly “We are close… I just don’t know where he is most of the time” even to Stiles’ ears that sounded like pure bullshit.

“Oh Stiles” Derek hugged him again gently, his arms rested around his waist.

“I really want you to go, just go I want to be alone, I will give you guys the information tomorrow”

“But I...” Stiles interrupted.

“I said tomorrow, I don’t want to see you and I don't want you here”

Derek looked hurt for a moment but moved to the window where he disappeared after jumping.

Stiles closed his eyes and let out a long breath, his legs were shaking, he sat down in the bathroom and looked at his hands were the white pills were, the words “Adderall” were mockingly glaring at him, and just for one minute, Stiles wondered how many he had to take to never wake up again.

**Author's Note:**

> comments feed my soul and make want to write more, do leave comments and make me know what you think


End file.
